Hi there,
My ex (35M) and I (35F) were together for 18 years and share three sons (14, 12 and 4) and a condo. We've been separated for 8 months but still living in the same house, as we're in a bit of a financial deadlock. We have $180k in equity in our condo. Selling right now would be a horrible move because cost of living in our area is crazy and that money (split in two, of course) wouldn't enable either of us to buy a house. My ex is willing to settle for $50k cash payment now with $20k deferred to whenever I sell the condo. The problem now is determining the best route for giving him the $50k. I thought of two different options:
- Taking out a 50k loan from my 401k. I would need to immediately default on it because I can't afford the payment. When the IRS bill comes around for the default, I plan to take out a loan at that time through a bank, which would enable me to pay it off in much smaller payments than the payments would've been for the $50k loan.
- Taking out a $50k loan from a bank and paying it off over 8 years - $875/month. Hesitant about this one b/c it'll put me in a financial hole on a monthly basis.
For further context, he has agreed to pay $700/month in child support. With him leaving, my monthly bills will be going from $2k to somewhere around $4k and I bring home $7k every month. ALSO, we are not legally married and he is not on the deed of the house but has contributed equally so I am trying to be fair. Curious about thoughts on the two options, or if anyone has any other suggestions.
TIA!
original posted by Technical-Shock-1715 to r/personalfinance on Tue, 09 Apr 2024 15:47:36 GMT.